Blog: Why everyone is stupid and everything is shit – an introduction and “They”

Let’s just explain things a little here. I fucking hate people. Truly. I mean, seeing as you’re browsing an independent magazine devoted to underground tunes, chances are you have a bigger and more appreciative brain than the rest, but if we met in real life, I’ll tell you now, I’d be more likely to look at the ground than at your face. Your face would annoy me. The ground is honest and your face isn’t. Yeah yeah, I realise this is no way to introduce myself. I wouldn’t be surprised if you dropped a comment calling me a closed-minded twat and turned your computer off.

Max Watt

Hi, how are you doing. Take a seat. The missing question mark is to suggest that I am totally devoid of joy and enthusiasm, and if you don’t get that then I’m afraid to say that the point I’m setting out to make here is already proven. I won’t lie, I’m here to blow off some steam, and also to trek down some of the darker avenues of the mind to find out what’s there. Well, I mean, I think I already know what’s there, and it rhymes with matred (which isn’t actually a word), but who knows? We could make a hell of a discovery together here.

Let’s start by reiterating the point again, just in case it turns out that I can’t write for shit and the topic didn’t hit home in the opening. Everyone is  stupid and insipid, and everything they do is boring. This series of…well, of chunks of words, is here for the express purpose of peaking angrily into those issues, and eventually destroying the world (obviously). This time around, we’re gonna hit an issue that simply needs to be dealt with. A facet of speech you all know and use on a daily basis that makes me want to cry and kill. I, naturally, am exempt from all judgement here, merely because these are my words, and they are the only things in my pathetic life that I can control. Anyway, without beating about the bush…


Why do people say things like ‘Oh! It would be awesome if They would make a film about that’, or ‘Hey, that’s a great idea. There should be a song with lyrics like that.’ Christ alive, this kind of talk encompasses the mundaneness of human nature so well that it’s almost impossible not to commit genocide when you hear it.

They? Who in the hell are They? That’s a big question. Really, They could be any drone on the street. Most likely They are the film companies, the record labels, and all the flashy bastards within them, but that’s exactly what is so very wrong and stupid about comments like these. People always have to refer to third parties when talking about their own ideas.  So truly, this elusive They are nothing more than ‘someone else’, i.e, someone with more talent and ambition than themselves.

Ask yourself this. Why can’t YOU, perpetrator of this horrendous human tendency, make a film or write a song or paint a picture? Obviously your stupidity, shiftlessness and desire to sit behind the television at night instead of building some substance within makes things kinda difficult, but come on! Have some belief in yourself. Every single one of us has the potential to do what the various Theys do. Sure, you might not have a million quid to do it with, or a network of people backing you, but dammit, you can still do it, because none of that shit matters in this day and age.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want you to succeed. I want you to stay inside your shell and make this insipid nature known to the world (mainly so that I can feel like I’m better than you), and most of all, stay the fuck away from me, but if you have an idea that you genuinely want to see happen, what’s holding you back? Yes, aside from your debt and your full-time job and your dumb-ass children that you decided to have because you felt it was high time you got yourself a cute little human-shaped pet, but how important are those fullbacks compared to your inner desire and the intrinsic values it carries?

Truthfully though, nobody knows who they’re talking about when referring to They, they’re just pointing outwards to something unseen, that doesn’t matter to them, that they don’t want to or have to think about, but that’s just more proof to me that the oh so wonderful brains of human beings, crafted by the complexity of evolution, aren’t worth shit. People say this stuff every day. Think of all the conversations you’ve had where you went from nothing to nothing, all the times you smiled and spoke to someone in a futile hope of making a friend or getting laid. Add it up and that’s years of your life whittled away, and much more similar whittling will happen in the future. Hell, probably today. And what does it mean? Where does it take you? Nothing. Nowhere.

Trivia – There are people out there who don’t feel cheated by social interaction. Wow. Props to you, guys. But you’re mental.

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